Funny Facts About Short Girls

I have personally met a lot of short girls in my life & to be frank i love everyone of them. I have always wanted to date a short girl or sorry 'Babe' (that means she is hot). but it seems God doesn't want that to happen.. #sadmuch but its all good sha maybe God is keeping her as my wife sha..like the always say "The Patient dog eats the fattest bone" LoL.. okay back to business..here are some jokes about short babes..pls dont kill me oooo!!!

1. First of all, If You are below 5'7" - You are a short babe

2. Short babes don't like beans - I pirri y'all...chicken n chips won't make u tall oooo.

3. A Short Babe taking pic with Yao Ming - Horror Movie.... P.S - in case you dont know Yao Ming..He is the tallest Basketballer (last time i checked tho)

4. Most short babes look tall in the club - Don't be deceived by the shoes but some are still short even with the shoes on...sorry case!

5. Short babes go to tailors to adjust the length of their jeggings!!

6. Their legs don't touch the floor when they sit!!

7. Short babes stand while giving BlowJob!!#okBye

8. Its funny aw short babes carry bags bigger than them!!

9. A Short babe in a car - u would expect to see dis at d back of the car 'Baby on Board'...You wont even see them in the car if you looking from outside.

10. Short babes are approximately the same height with the BRT's wheel!!

11. Short babes always wanna date tall guys!!I can imagine!!so that they can stretch & kiss...smh

12. Finally i love all short babes like i said earlier..so please don't take this post P..I Love everyone of you!! i dedicate this post to all the short babes i know my two lovely sisters, @rhayor(love u plenty boo), @LoopyGaga(stubborn goat), @shaddybanks(short babe toh n sey ojoro), @ipinayo, @evesdoll ...love y'all much!!!

#DearFutureKid

This Post should have been titled ‘Letter to my Un-Born Child’ but since I’m not Tupac I have decided to do it my own way..:D

My Dear Unborn Child, I’m sure you reading this with an iPad wherever you are.. I know that’s how we roll in 21st century!!LOL!! Okay on a serious note…I will probably be in my late 40s or early 50s before you even know I owned this blog (That’s if nothing happens by 2012)..Anyway there are few things I would like to tell you before you step into Planet Earth…n Please don’t depart from these words….

1. Always #PutGodFirst in anything you do even if its bad… even thieves pray before their operation – I’m not saying you should go and steal oooo!!!

2. Don't obey the quote 'Love is Blind' open ur eyes oooo!! Girls aren't smiling these days.. You have to be sharp!!!

3.There is nothing like a Tooth Fairy..if u put your Tooth under your Pillow..you have carry last oo..cause you wont see 1kobo.

4. Get your hustle on...don't expect me to buy u a phone..sha don't fuck for a phone sha..That's self degrading!!

5. Don't worry I won't bore with all those 'When I was your age' tales that your grandfather use to tell..just do your thing n DO IT RIGHT!!!

6. Go for the hot Girls..Don't settle for the geeks oooo..as long as the hot girl isn't a UNILAG babe sha!!LOL!!!

7. Do Not scam me the way i scammed my father - you had better be smart with your scams.

8. If i hear say you turn Gay - Na to remove your Prick remain oooo!!!

9. Don't have sex but if you must (cause i know Konji is a Bastard) please use a condom.

10. Always stay Happy and always activate your 'IDGAF' mode cause people are gonna say a lot of rubbish about you whether its true or false.

11. Its not about the certificate dear..its about the ideas...You must be able be think hard...but that doesn't mean you should come back to my house with a 3rd Class ooo..I will kill you!!

12. Incase you see any 'Tunde ednut' or 'Timaya' CD n my CD rack...Please don't play it... P.S - Abstain from Bad Music

13. My Twitter Account is up for inheritance..Don't worry it will be verified b4 u re born... #Jokes

14. Life is gonna fuck you hard..so always be horny - Get ready for Life..its gonna be a tough ride!! Trust Me!!

15. I will always love you as long as i live. Will work out my head to make sure you become something in life & i will always be there for you if you need a shoulder to cry on!! LOVE YOU PLENTY!!

#BasedOnLogistics

1.Whenever a guy says 'I love you' ...he doesn't mean it buh the girl always believes!!
2.MTN is the worst network in Nigeria!!------MTN knows this too #DontArgueJustAgree
3.NEPA/PHCN receives the highest amount of curses per day..sorry if your popsy works there!!!
4.Picasa is an ugly girls's best friend.
5.Ugly girls have the best character.(no need for fronting)!!*in wizkid's voice*
6.Most girls that walk into ozolua,highrise and computer(unilag) don't always come out the same way ;)
7.Calabar girls are the best when it comes to sex...(I heard oooo)
8.Ugly boys(with money) get the hawtest babes...don't let your babe meet one!!
9.Most Pretty babes are Hoe-lodos...#justsaying
10.@IAmWhorl3y is addicted to twitter #okBye
11.Most girls with big ass always have small boobs and Girls with big boobs have flat ass!!abeg haf both in the right proportion now!!
12.Pictures could be deceiving!!like serzly
13.Lesbians are HOT!! I know this too!!
14.Nicki Minaj will need 2 chairs to sit comfortably!!
15.HIV is real and condoms don't help!
16.Gays aren't normal...they should be admitted in YabaLeft..#Fact
17.Unilag boiz always wait for year1 n diploma babes!! - 'Catch them young'
18.Girls keep their shit well!!You hardly catch a girl cheating.
19.People pick on that @Odinabarbie geh too much..only God knows what she has done wrong.
20.Kanye West makes GoodMusic!! #GBAM!!!
21.Haters are always gonna hate.
22.An ashewo doesn't reject pay after service.P.S #justsaying - this isn't from experience oooo!!
23.Smokers don't give a fuck about DEATH!!
24.Boiz love Dumb pretty Gehs - very easy to manipulate.
25.Cold Weather equals Konji...if You don't haf a babe bside you when it rains..Na you know ooo..
26.There are no good TTs on twitter anymore..we have killed all.
27.Most girls with 'Pretty' or 'Barbie' or 'Hawt' in the TwitterHandles are far from the meaning of those words apart frm my dear frnd @sm1pretty sha..sheIsFineLikedat
28.We all say we don't give a Fuck when we deeply know we do!!
29.Nobody z above Gbagaun..my English teacher gbagauned..So.......
30.I killed this TT #okBye

L.I.F.E.

Life has taught me:
1.The word 'Trust' doesn't exist..Never trust anyone..not even your family..buh I trust mine sha..lol
2.No one cares for you or loves you like family!!
3.The word 'LOVE' has become useless..its bin misused!!
4.SEX is overrated
5.Life is short...Enjoy it to the fullest..cus when its time..no remote control..no rewind. ;)
6.Babalawos are scammers...
7.Okada(Motorcycles) z the fastest means of transport buh the most dangerous.
8.Twitter = CRUISE..
9.You can never find ur so-called #DearFutureHusband on twitter..
10.One Naira babes don't exist...#dontdull
11.Jesus is the main n best source of happiness!!
12.Some Nollywood movies have nice moral lessons buh could be really stupid!!
13.Never lie to people you care about.
14.If you really love someone..you will put their feelings first.
15.No condition is Permanent
16.Don't look for job in MTN or PHCN...or else.......
17.419 is the cleanest form of illegal act #justsaying
18.Harry Potter is mere Fiction...don't put a broomstick between ur legs n think you will fly #Fail
19.Smokers don't fear DEATH...cus cigarette producers tell 'em they will die soon but they still smoke..
20.Ugly girls have good characters.
21.The Nigerian Police Force is not your Friend.
22.No secret is forever hidden.
23.If there was no cause for us to pay for BIS or buy recharge cards..we would probably be twice richer than we are now
24.Education sucks but its fucking important.
25.Haters are gonna keep hating.
26.You can't be successful without Hardwork
27.Opinions aren't fact..take 'em n let em go.
28.Always respect your lady/man.
29.Not all friends are true friends..some friends suck.
30.God is able!
31.If you love someone..show it.
32.Life without the ones you love suck!!
33.Life is not fair buh that's why it is Life.
34.You never know what you got until you lose it.
35.Always #PutGodFirst

Dirty Secrets - The Mask Party

Dirty Secrets - The Mask Party
Proudly Brought to you by The BeatBoxx & Ace Ent
Venue : Tribeca
Date : 29-04-2011
Free for all....Strictly by Invitation!!!
DontDull its gonna be sick!!!
Coverage by MiloungeTv, Zone Mag, Liquor Music
For More Info PIN : 22DD5190 or follow @IAmWhorl3y

27th January, 2002 (27-01-2002)

4 days to my bday..Every *living* lagosian should remember this day.. lot of souls were lost on this day..would have been one but I thank Almighty God for his grace..

Okay, Jan 21 my mother was involved in an accident….Jan 24 we were attacked by armed robbers in our house...where I received one hot slap..lmao…funny night but really wasn’t funny. Still down with the whole problem, On Sunday, January 27, 2002… we attended Church service which wasn’t all that to us cause we were still kinda down. Got home n ate then our lovely cousins came with an invitation to a friend’s birthday party. We turned down the invite at first but after they told us we should just go to get over the whole problem that has been happen we decided to accept the invite. As for me I still turned down the invite but what can I do… I was way too young to go against my father’s will, so I decided to go with my face frowning n all…lmao…

The Journey took us like 30mins-45mins to get to the venue… ask where the venue was… ‘Ikeja Cantonment’…didn’t even know what a cantonment was sef until I entered so I didn’t even take it serious..then my parents sed since the bday party was for kids..they will leave us there n come back for us after the party cause they had their own party on the island….(buh really #WhoDoesThis? Leave 3kids of about age 10 in an unknown place) <<
The Party started soon after that…we ate n all..okay dunno if u can remember this kinda game where the song plays n you have to dance round the chair..blah blah blah..(cant stand explaining abeg)..okay it was time for this game, we had even started sef then suddenly I saw a man run towards the party and he shouted ‘RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!’..immediately he finished that statement….BOOMMMMM!!!! it was…I actually thought it was an earthquake at first…lmao..everybody started running for their dear lives..but I had nobody to run to…NO DADDY!!NO MUMMY!! I was so scared n confused..couldnt even find my sisters n cousins again.. I just started crying and running towards the same direction everyone was running to…then luckily for me I met my uncle on the way who was already with my sisters n cousins..i was the only one left… This was how God rescued my sorry ass from death.

Really dunno where I will be today if God hadn’t sent my uncle to that party.. I will probably be dead, missing or hustling for a life on the streets..My mum sat on the kitchen floor that night n cried promising us she would never leave us again for anything in this world..That was one sad night in the history of my family cause we all escaped death by God’s grace.. This was when I started developing my agoraphobia… I cant really stay in a crowded place for so long.. for the first five years after that I didn’t leave my the house except when I wanted to go to school..buh im kinda over it now sha…

Just cant keep thanking God about that day…Really grateful to the most high!!!

LASERS

Released : March 4, 2011 (2011-03-04)
Recorded : 2008–2011
Genre : Hip hop
Length : 47:41
Label : 1st & 15th, Atlantic
Producer : Lupe Fiasco (executive)
Charles "Chilly" Patton (executive)
Darrale Jones (co-executive)
The Audibles, Alex da Kid, The Buchanans, Ishi, Kane Beatz, King David, Needlz, The Neptunes, Soundtrakk, Jerry Duplessis, Syience, Arden Altino, Miykal Snoddy.

This is the 3rd Studio Album by Lupe Fiasco...It was originally titled "We Are Lasers"...and then changed to "Lasers". "Lasers" is a backronym for "Love Always Shines Everytime, Remember 2 Smile".

Two Singles have been released so far..."The show goes On"..It was produced by Kane Beatz and samples Modest Mouse's "Float On" as part of the chorus and was released On October 26, 2010..while the 2nd single is titled "Words I Never Said". The song is produced by Alex da Kid and features American singer-songwriter Skylar Grey. The song was released for digital download on February 8, 2011. It has since peaked at number 89 on the US Billboard Hot 100.

The album debuted at number one on the US Billboard 200 chart, with first-week sales of 204,000 copies.Lasers marks Fiasco's first number one album on the chart as well as his best selling first-week sales.The album is Fiasco's second top ten album on the chart with his first album, Food & Liquor, debuting at number eight in 2006, and The Cool debuting at number 15 in 2007.

TRACK LISTING

1."Letting Go" (featuring Sarah Green)
2."Words I Never Said" (featuring Skylar Grey)
3."Till I Get There"
4."I Don't Wanna Care Right Now" (featuring MDMA)
5."Out of My Head" (featuring Trey Songz)
6."The Show Goes On"
7."Beautiful Lasers (2 Ways)" (featuring MDMA)
8."Coming Up" (featuring MDMA)
9."State Run Radio" (featuring Matt Mahaffey)
10."Break the Chain" (featuring Eric Turner and Sway)
11."All Black Everything"
12."Never Forget You" (featuring John Legend)

My Fave Track on this Album has to be "Letting go"..Damn!!the fact that Lupe took that Hook was so amazing..then Sarah Green killed that Outro...Nice Verses by Lupe..I also like "Words I Never Said"..Skylar Grey never ceases to amaze me..this lady is talented..Other nice tracks are "The Show Goes On" & "Never Forget You"..Nice Album..I rate this album 6.5/10...#DontArgueJustAgree...